Why am I breathing, existing, if I cannot even become who I wish I was? Why am I wasting my time, my life, attempting to reach standards I cannot obtain?
God is omniscient, God is omnipresent. His knowledge and wisdom are incomprehensible, and he is able to search even that which is within our hearts and minds. God had no intention of creating us to actually be equal to him in power and knowledge. And if he had wished for us to be perfect, he would create us, instantaneously, to be perfect. Rather, he remains faithful to us, though we often are not to him.
Perhaps the meaning of life is to simply put forth our best effort, to try hard to please God. This will indefinitely form endurance and persistence in us. Maybe we cannot reach the perfection that we deem worthy. For example, I had established a simple routine which involved preparing myself for the day and cleaning, that God might be glorified in my actions. But really, I thought, personally, that I would obtain perfection if I could first complete this routine, without forgetting a thing or making an error. Surprisingly, I kept making errors and messing up, getting into an OCD-like cycle to simply accomplish this routine I wanted to. Finally, God told me I wasn’t making any emotional progress trying to “be perfect,” ridiculous as it sounds.
I am not to be God; I am to glorify God by my actions and heart by waiting patiently as he sanctifies me. Perfection can wait. I would rather be near to and please God in all my imperfection.